You Wish! Productions presents...

How Anime TV Show Parodies SHOULD be!

Part 2!

By: White Blaze Wannabe

This time, it's my favorite game show, the Weakest Link! MWHAHA!

Vash (as the announcer guy): Heh! Hey everyone! Since you all know I'm a nice, peace loving guy, I sort of kind of gave the role of the evil bitch host lady to Asuka.

Asuka: (evil grin) You certainly owed it to me.

Audience: (is either cowering in fear or yelling at Vash)

Vash: EEP! Let's just get on with the show! Our eight contestants tonight are...Relena Peacecraft from the Sanq Kingdom!

Audience: (is now booing Relena)

WBW: Yeah yeah...I'm even booing myself for that one...

Vash: (sweatdrop even though he can't be seen) That's one for today...Heero Yuy from colony L1!

(Fan girls...yeah...do I really need to go into detail?)

Vash: Major Misato Katsuragi from Tokyo 3!

(Fan boys...yeah...again, I'm stopping here.)

Vash: And Rei Ayanami, also from Tokyo 3!

(You know what...screw those fan people!)

Asuka: What?! You let Wondergirl on this show?!

Vash: EEP! Maybe Meryl's right! I really am an idiot!

Misato: (sighs) Can we just get on with the show? I really need a new car! Mine is STILL a wreck from the 3rd Angel!

Asuka: (grumbles)

Vash: Okie dokie! We have Nuriko from somewhere in Konan the author forgot if she knows or not! And also from somewhere in Konan, Tamahome! I bet the author just put you on here because she thinks you're hot...

Tamahome: (shrugs) I'd say that's a pretty good guess, but you should look at who's after me before you decide...

Vash: (sweatdrops) This is probably going to be what I think it is...(looks down at his list and groans) Legato Bluesummers...from God knows where because the author sure doesn't!

Legato: (since has to be eating in every single appearance he makes, he's got a lollipop, but he has enough class to take it out of his mouth when he talks) And yes, Vash, I'd say that I'm probably in the same situation as that guy who really needs a haircut...

Vash: (groans again) Whatever...and for our last, but not least contestant...Milly! Now that's just cruel! Ugh...inform me when the first round's over. I'm going to go cry...

(the suspenseful music plays as the lights fall on the contestants and the host)

Asuka: (is wearing some oddly familiar dark sunglasses and a black trench coat)

Shinji: Wait! Aren't those my bastard of a father's glasses?

Asuka: (in her famous evil sarcastic tone) Yes, baka, but you know what?

Shinji: W-what?

Asuka: You're not even in this fic!

Shinji: EEP! (is liquefied into LCL because the author is thinking way to much about End of Eva, probably because she'll never understand it...)

Misato: Well that was gross...Anyway! Let's just get going! I need a new car!

Tamahome: Hey! I thought I was supposed to be the money obsessed person?!

Misato: Well, I'm probably a hell of a lot poorer than you!

Asuka: Trust her on that one...Anyway! Let's begin! For those of you who don't know the rules of the game, it goes like this. This round is two minutes long. In that two minutes I will ask you all questions starting from the left and going to the right. Each question is worth a certain amount of money, such as $1,000--

Misato: Whatever happened to Yen?

Everyone else, except Rei: What's a Yen? Come to think of it...what's a dollar?

Milly: Yeah! I though it was double dollars!

Asuka: Screw it! Let's just play the freaking game! Start the clock! (whirls around to face Relena) Relena, what's the most annoying thing in all of anime?

Relena: The fact that Heero doesn't love me?

Asuka: No! I would have accepted either you or Pikachu. Heero, what's the greatest mecha in all of anime?

Heero: Wing Zero.

Asuka: No. Evangelion Unit 02.

Heero: (deathglares) (almost sounds angry) That was a biased answer...

Asuka: So was yours!

Heero: (reaches for his gun...but doesn't find it)

Vash: Thank God for security!

Asuka: Misato, why did you switch beer brands in the middle of the series?

Misato: Uh...I don't remember...

Asuka: Correct!

Everyone: (sweatdrop)

Asuka: Wondergirl, who does Shinji like more, you or me?

Rei: I do not understand.

Asuka: And I do not want to know and if I gave an answer all of Eva fandom would kill the author...hmm...(evil look) Wait...she still owes me...I'll save it. Nuriko, who's the stupidest person in your anime?

Nuriko: (guilty, but still mischievous look) Sorry, but that would be Miaka.

Asuka: Correct!

Tamahome: HEY!

Nuriko: You of all people, Tamakins, should know that...

Tamahome: (sighs) (whispers) Don't tell anyone, but yes, I do...

Asuka: Tamahome, why are you even in this fic?

Tamahome: Because the author likes me, even if I'm taken...

Asuka: Correct! Legato, is Knives crazy?

Legato: It would be uncharacteristic of me to say 'duh', but in this case I would. Duh!

Asuka: Correct! Milly,

Milly: Bank!

Everyone: (mass sweatdrop #2) (note, this is everyone besides Heero and Rei, because, well, them sweatdropping would be likely to set off another Third Impact)

Vash: Holy crap! She did something intelligent!

Milly: What? Did I get the question right?

Everyone (excluding Heero and Rei, for the above reasons): (facefaults)

Asuka: And that's round one! Geez! We only got though once! You people need to learn to shut up!

Audience: (laughs)

Asuka: That wasn't really funny, but okay...Anyway, you managed to bank a PATHETIC $5,000. Mien Gott! This is really freaking sad! And that really dumb girl with the huge gun was the only one that banked anything! Is it possible that you are all as stupid as Shinji?

Shinji: B-but!

Asuka: Shut up! You've been liquefied!

Shinji: Yes ma'am...

Asuka: Now it's time for you idiots to vote the stupidest one of you off! (tries to conceal the small index card she is holding for the contestants to see that says 'Vote Wondergirl off!' from the audience)

Vash: Statistically, pretty much everyone on here is an idiot in their own way, so yeah...but it's the votes that count!

Asuka: All right! Time's up! Let's see your votes!

Relena: No one.

Asuka: Damn Pacifists...

Heero: Relena

Misato: That girl who thinks she's English...

Asuka: You mean Relena? Right?

Misato: How can I be expected to remember anything?

Asuka: I guess not...

Rei: Rei.

Asuka: Stupid clone that thinks she has no self-worth...

Nuriko: Relena.

Tamahome: (pissed off) Nuriko.

Nuriko: HEY!

Tamahome: (sticks out his tongue)

Legato: Vash.

Asuka: Okay...even if he's not playing...

Legato: But he IS the weakest link!

Vash: (sighs) That lollipop isn't sugar free...God help us...

Milly: Mr. Legato because he's mean!

Asuka: You didn't need to give a reason. Mr. Yuy, why did you vote for practically the only person you get paired with in non-yaoi fics?

Heero: Because she should die...

Relena: But Heeeeeeeeeeeeero!

Everyone (even Heero and Rei): (covers their ears)

Asuka: Good choice! Relena! You are the weakest link! Get the hell off my show!

Relena: (steps away from her podium thingy in a dignified, but still annoying way) Well, I don't really believe in competition--(is shot...by PenPen)

Audience: (cheers)

Misato: Good boy, PenPen! I'll make Shinji cook for you tonight!

Shinji: Wasn't I liquefied?

Misato: Then how are you talking?

Shinji: I-I-I have no idea...

Asuka: Okay then! When we get back, round 2 of the weakest link!

---Begin Commercial---

Kaji: Do you have someone bugging you that you just can't get rid of? A blue priest that looks like a raisin that's possessing you? A Gundam pilot that won't shut up? Any anime female with pink hair? Well then call 1-800-PEN-PENKILLS today! Our penguin assassins are efficient and if they are caught, they can't be convicted since the laws don't apply to them! So call today!

---End Commercial---

Asuka: These assholes have all voted off some idiotic pacifist, so now we can get on with the show! Heero, is anything ending in 'mon' to be associated with the devil?

Heero: Yes.

Asuka: Duh! Digimon and Pokemon are just crappy animes created to brainwash you! Misato, where's Kaji?

Misato: How the hell am I supposed to know?!

Asuka: Correct! And if you did know, then you'd be...ahem...stealing him from me...but anyway...Wondergirl, exactly how many clones do you have?

Rei: I have not been able to count them all...

Asuka: ...I guess I'll accept that, but I was looking for way too many. Tamahome, which anime has hotter guys, Fushigi Yuugi or Weiss Kruez?

Tamahome: (looks nervously at all the fan girls in the audience) I'd be killed if I answered...

Asuka: Correct! Nuriko--

Nuriko: These questions are scary...I'm banking.

Asuka: Yeah...Who is gayer, if that's even a word, you or Kaworu.

Nuriko: Definitely Kaworu...

Asuka: Correct! Legato--

Akito (from somewhere aboard the Nadesico): This show is boring...(yawns) I wish they'd just get to the final round...(is swamped by every female on the ship until he eventually throws them all out of his room) (by that time, it is the final round)

Asuka: Okay, let's re-cap the show so far. Milly got voted off because she's just a freaking idiot, as well as Heero, because he threatened to blow up the studio when he missed a question. Tamahome and Nuriko got kicked off as well when questions about things such as 'movies' and 'telephones' found their way to them. Misato final collapsed into a drunken heap and was carried off by PenPen, so that leaves us with Legato and Wondergirl. All I have to say is (turns to Legato with an evil grin) you better kick some major ass Mr. Bluesummers!

Legato: (is on his 5th lollipop) MWHAHA!

Asuka: Let's begin then. I will ask you a series of alternating questions, five each. Whoever answers the most gets the $80,000 you managed to bank, even though you could've gotten a million, but I guess not everyone can be a college graduate and pilot a sophisticated robot by the time they are 14 like me. Since Wondergirl is just an emotionless bitch who keeps trying to vote herself off, Legato will go first. Why does anime kick ass?

Legato: Hehehehe....um....it just does?

Asuka: Correct! Clone-bitch, is all shojo anime just plain idiotic?

Rei: Yes.

Asuka: WOW! I think that was actually the first plain 'yes' we've gotten out of you the whole show! For some reason, that is very disturbing...Legato, which brand of Misato's beer is more alcoholic, Boa or Yebichu?

Legato: Hahhahah...I'll go with Yebichu.

Asuka: Both of them were right anyway...Ayanami no ikeike, out of the three Tenchi series, which sucked the most?

Rei: The animation and character development of Tenchi in Tokyo was substandard.

Asuka: Correct, goddammit! You know what...I'm getting tired of this...whoever answers this one right wins. What is the true theme of Neon Genesis Evangelion?

(Everyone is silent for minutes, days, weeks, probably even years, until PenPen 'accidentally' shoots Rei)

Asuka: (does a victory dance) All right! That means Legato is our winner!

Legato: BREWHAHAA! Excellent!

Rei III or IV or XVI, who cares?: But no one has answered the question yet...?

Asuka: ARGH!!!!!!!!! Damn clone!!!!! (starts chasing after Rei)

Vash: Well, I think that's about it for today. I'm gonna run away before Asuka beats me again and Legato messes with my head, but stay tuned next time for Win Vash the Stampede's Bounty (credit for this name goes out to FFH)! With my lovely co-host (reads the piece of paper being handed to him) NO!!!!!!!!!! Not Asuka again!!! Where are those insurance girls! I need to get a policy! Something that will cover dismemberment...eeek....save me...please?

Fin

Thought I wouldn't come back, didn't ya? Let's see, now I can add Fushigi Yuugi to the list and Nadesico too, but there's still more to come! Ja ne and please review!!!

-White Blaze Wannabe >^.^<-